Something has been unleashed in me these last months and I don't know quite how to describe it. A transformation into a new way of thinking and being. Letting go of old habits and welcoming in the new. A new level of consciousness about myself and what I want for my life; my truth is literally spilling out of me.
This is it! One life in this body! LIVE IT!
I've been so lucky to have had pretty awesome experiences as of late. Everything from smelling the mossy hillside and reveling in it, to crying my eyes out and laughing hysterically straight afterwards. I have had long walks on the most pristine beaches and listened for hours to the howling wind blow away all that needs to go. I've had encounters with other beautiful souls, people who aren't afraid to look me in the eyes. Thank you. It amazes me that while I get more and more clear about my own path, I not only hear and see more truth in myself, I find it in other people, in the trees, in the sky, in fire, in animals--everywhere around me. What a cool thing. I believe, that is how love and healing spreads, by learning how to stop and listen to ourselves first.
I think a lot of my clarity has come with a release of fear. Finally. Fear is something that I have been holding on to for a very long time. Like a long lost friend that somehow gives me the illusion of comfort. If I stay in my fear, I don't have to move, make any decisions, or change my life. I think somehow I found comfort in that. "Better the devil you know" as the saying goes. It's not true though. It's all a gamble, all of it. So why not follow your gut?
Sure, I can pretend I'm comfortable with where I'm at, instead of facing my own fears and moving forward, but I won't be any safer or feel any better. Fear had frozen me for a long time, and I didn't even realize it. I had become so afraid that I gave into it and accepted it as a part of me. Fear of being alone, fear of trusting myself, fear of feeling vulnerable. It was all there and more. Every day. Funny thing is, that now as I move through these fears, I don't feel alone, I trust myself more than ever and my vulnerability humbles me and allows me to connect in ways I couldn't have imagined.
I keep asking myself, what do I have to lose? Come on! It's time to experience a new deliciousness of life. And, that's exactly what life is. Delicious. Scrumptious. Mouthwatering. Delectable. Even when it might not feel that way. I am reaching for the stars friends, come and join me, let's play and be real with each other!
